A Message Re: Valentine's Day

As Valentine's Day near, we've decided to initiate a new office policy, effective immediately.

No employee will be allowed to receive flowers from external personnel unless said personnel distribute said flowers equally to all Dumasho employees.

This will help limit discrimination against Single-Americans.

We thank you for understanding,

Mary McMann-Sanchez
Senior HR Officer
mary.mcmann-sanchez@dumasho.com
Tel: 855-344-3333 x99385473394
Fax: 855-334-3334

Message Board Removed

Attention Dumasho Employees,

The employee message board is not a place to buy and sell marijuana. Until further notice, the board has been removed.

Mary McMann-Sanchez
Senior HR Officer
mary.mcmann-sanchez@dumasho.com
Tel: 855-344-3333 x99385473394
Fax: 855-334-3334

Reminder: Snow Day Policy

Just a reminder that Dumasho does not acknowledge "snow days". All employees are expected to be in on time. I counted a lot of empty seats at 8:30 this morning.

Warmly,

Mary McMann-Sanchez
Senior HR Officer
mary.mcmann-sanchez@dumasho.com
Tel: 855-344-3333 x99385473394
Fax: 855-334-3334

Reminder: Turn In Your Blackberry If You Are Terminated

A nameless former employee abused the Dumasho Intranet yesterday because he still had his Blackberry in his possession.

Please remember to turn in all mobile devices upon termination.

Warmly yours,

Mary McMann-Sanchez
Senior HR Officer
mary.mcmann-sanchez@dumasho.com
Tel: 855-344-3333 x99385473394
Fax: 855-334-3334

I fucking hate this company!!! Dumasho sucks!

you can all fucking suck my anus. this is the stupidest fucking company i've ever been a part of. fire me??? fuck all you cocksuckers.

-Sent from my Nextel Wireless BlackBerry

Happy MLK Day

Happy advance MLK to all Dumasho employees.

To answer some of the questions I've been receiving anonymous letters in my mailbox about: No you don't have to be African-American to take the day off.








Mary McMann-Sanchez
Senior HR Officer
mary.mcmann-sanchez@dumasho.com
Tel: x99385473394

Dumasho Employee Profile: Mary McMann-Sanchez

This is the first in the series of getting to know your fellow Dumasho employees.

Mary McMann-Sanchez

How long have you worked at Dumasho Corporation?

I started at Dumasho Corporation in 1999 as an HR rep and now I'm the senior HR rep, so it's like a big honor for me to be your HR rep.

What is your favorite thing about Dumasho Corporation?
I think it's the people. Everyone is just so supporting and fun to be with.

What are you looking forward to at Dumasho Corporation?

I'm really looking forward to the mandatory sensitivity training course all employees are required to attend next week. I thin it'll be a neat experience for everyone.

Reminder: Women's Bathroom

Greetings Dumasho Employees,

Lately there has been a recurring issue with feces appearing on the walls of the bathroom. Please be advised it does not belong there.

Regards,

Mary McMann-Sanchez
Senior HR Officer
mary.mcmann-sanchez@dumasho.com
x99385473394

Intranet User Statistics Are Out

Hi everyone,

I am very happy to report that intranet usage hit an all-time high yesterday at Dumasho Corporation. You all deserve a pat on the back.

I've compiled a chart that shows our estimated daily usage for 2009.

Dumasho Corporation

Keep up the great work,

Mary McMann-Sanchez
Senior HR Officer
x99385473394

Dumasho Logo Q?

does anyone know why we don't have ayn balck models on our website? It's all stock photos of white people.

Jack Sawyer
EVP Marketing
Jack.Sawyer@Dumasho.com
X99385473393